Food and I have had a very finicky relationship over the past decade. My college years don’t count. I think I pretty much lived off of boxed mac and cheese and pizza. Yet somehow I didn’t gain a pound. Fast forward (what feels like) a century later and my hips are in a constant battle with my mouth. Do it, don’t do it, do it….my mouth always wins. What can I say I love food, I’m OBSESSED with food. For anyone that interacts with me on a daily basis I apologize. I should test myself to see if I can go one day without rambling about what I ate for lunch or what I’m going to have for dinner. Yes, I’m that girl.

I’m getting to that age in my life where everything my mother said, and that I argued adamantly against, falls out of my mouth like a constant stream of word vomit.

MOM: “Watch what you eat!” ME: Whatever…

MOM: “It will catch up with you…” ME: Whatever….

“Girls aren’t suppose to eat like line backers…” (wait did she tell me that??) ME: But I’m hungry…

Now don’t get me wrong, this isn’t a rant about how skinny or not skinny I wish I was, this is a rant to myself, the constant yo-yo dieter. The food obsessed, neurotic cook that, to my horror, now shovels food in my mouth faster then my husband. Sigh!

So what’s a girl to do when a big bowl of savory goodness and a crisp glass of wine makes me happier then a brand new handbag or shiny pair of shoes?? Weight Watchers! Because no other diet has ever lasted in my household, and with the scale ticking up, up, up…I know I have to do something about it.

Do you know what sucks worse then being on Weight Watchers, the fact that my husband gets DOUBLE the amount of points then I do. When I’m coming home from work craving nothing but a pre-dinner snack and dreading the evening workout, I’m faced with a joyful husband stating, “Wow I have 25 points left for dinner.” Tonight I had 4!!! FOUR points left for dinner. Yes I know that Spinach Salad with bacon and goat cheese at lunch didn’t help, and that tasty happy hour beverage (light beverage x2) wasn’t that light. It doesn’t matter…a girl craves what a girl craves.

And here I am. In my fourth cycle, within the last 5 years, of the famed diet. Now I just need to keep JHud’s gorgeous self as a motivator and learn how to eat like a girl. This isn’t an anti-weight watchers rant, just simply me complaining into the void that I can no longer eat my weight in food like I could when I was a youthful college student. No more late night pizza runs, no more Taco Bueno for lunch then nachos for dinner, and no more eating the same portions as a grown ass man. I will still indulge every once in a while to keep my sanity, but I’ll stick to this until that last pound is finally shed and I’m back to my goal weight.

Thanks for listening! Now where are those girl scout cookies…